I can always tell when my husband drove my car because he messes up the seat and all the mirrors and changes the radio station on me. As I adjust everything back to their proper coordinates I listen to comedian on the radio. (Henri was listening to Laugh USA on Sirius, apparently.)
“My father, he just keeps losing his keys.” I feel your father’s pain, Mr. Comedian. “He can’t remember if he left them on the kitchen table or on the desk. I mean he was always losing his keys. So last year, my brothers and sisters, we all chipped in and put him in a home.”
I started laughing, not just because it was a funny bit, but because I think my family is about to put me in a home too. I’m not sure if it’s the reduced-carb diet or the supplements or the general exhaustion from working out so much, but I am forgetting everything lately.
At various times over the past two weeks I have neglected to pack in my gym bag: my socks, a water bottle, a bra to wear after my shower, sneakers (I was on the treadmill in boots that day,) my weight lifting gloves, and I remembered my iPod but forgot the headphones.
My home life was not much better. I would walk into a room full of vigor and purpose and once inside the room had absolutely no idea why I was there. It felt like ‘baby brain’ which is when you’re pregnant and can remember nothing. So to help myself I would say whatever I was looking for aloud until I saw it. But that didn’t always help and it made me seem like a crazy person who talks to herself and owns 100 cats. (Don’t worry – I have no pets; just children.)
But today is different. Today, I am in command of my mind. I have Rylee fully dressed, fed and getting into the car with her lunch packed in her Disney Princess backpack. Go me. Little Henry is also dressed and fed and thankfully he gets into his car seat without struggle. We leave practically on time and I give myself a big mental high five.
We arrive at school only five (ok-seven) minutes late. Rylee gets out of the car and I unhook Henry to discover he is wearing socks but not shoes. Oops. I carry him in hoping no one notices my slight oversight. Rylee is wearing her ladybug dress and looks adorable.
But her dress is nothing compared to what all the other kids are wearing. Yes, Mother of the Year here forgot it was Pajama Day.
And I could not help thinking, “Oh my God, can’t they just go to school and learn to read and add? Why do I have to remember Pajama Day too? I bet kids in China don’t have Pajama Day!”
I guess I’ll just have to take that herb that helps your memory…now what was that herb called?
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