If you thought I only said dumb s*** to my first trainer, Daniel, oh you would be wrong. Already with Mel I’ve asked such questions as, “Why is that guy wearing a straitjacket?” (it was a jacket for powerlifting, fyi) and made the mistake of assuming a person’s gender was one thing only to discover I guessed it wrong. Oops. Mel’s eyes popped open wide as she laughed at me, “Lisa, you’ve been here almost a year and didn’t know that!?!” But those are different stories.
Yesterday we were working out our back/arm muscles. When I worked out alone with just Daniel I always kind of knew that I was weak in my upper body but now that I’m on a team and all the women work out together, I KNOW that I’m weak in my upper body. It’s so humbling when these other women are doing 100 lb lat pulldowns with barely a grunt and Mel has to help me pull down 70 lbs. so I can keep my form.
By the end of the circuit we were doing curls and I was just using the bar and couldn’t complete a set. “So…when am I going to get stronger?” I asked.
Mel laughed and shook her head at me. “That’s like saying, ‘I ate clean one day, how come I’m still fat?’ You haven’t even been bulking a full month yet!”
Losing weight and building muscle are two totally different beasts. When you’re losing weight it’s fairly easy to measure (just try on your pants) and when you’re successful you see it reflected back to you. Muscle is different. I’m sure they are growing in there but they seem to be keeping it secret from me. Plus, I’m supposed to remain a little heavier to grow muscle, so the muscles I do have remain hidden under a soft blanket of fat.
Mel gave me a pep talk. “Everyone wants results and no one is patient. I’m not. But think where you were just last week. You did more reps this time. Plus you’re dealing with a shoulder injury. You’re forgetting how far you’ve come. And you’re not thinking about how far you’ll go between now and next month.”
I knew she was right but my ego was bruised from my own harsh judgements. It wasn’t until later that night when what she said sunk in. Back in September I bought a five-pack class package at Inner Diva Studios for beginner pole dancing classes and chair tease. It’s an all-women’s studio and I finally went to the first class last night. It was so much fun!
While strutting my stuff and laughing with the other women in the class I recalled that this time last year I was size 14 and felt too ashamed to undress in the ladies locker room. And now I’m confident enough in my own skin to try something as sassy as beginner pole dancing.
Rather than being discouraged by my weak spots I’m choosing to be motivated to improve them. So, yes, I am going to get stronger. It just takes time and effort.
How have you changed over the past year? Are you in a better, stronger place too?
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