And….He Read It

You knew it was coming, right?  My husband, Henri, saw the post about how much money we spent on bodybuilding this past year.  (If you’re curious, here are my calculations:  The Real Co$t of Bodybuilding).  So here’s how that conversation went down:

I’m typing up my blog post, surrounded by receipts from various gyms and supplement stores.  “What are you doing?” asks my husband.  I spin in my office chair, blocking the view of my computer.

“Nothing…So how much does it cost to play golf?”

“What do you mean?”  He takes a sip of his Pepsi.

“Like, if golf were your sport of choice, what would you pay?”

“Oh, gosh, depending on the club you join, it could cost $100,000 plus annual membership fees.”

“Wow!  That’s a lot!  But I’m not talking Beverly Hills.  Just a regular old golf club.  How much?”  (See how reasonable I can be, not even asking for the most expensive scenario?)

“Well, maybe like $2,000-$4,000 for a local place, plus $30-$60 each time you want to play.”

“You’d play what, like once a week?”  (Yeah, right!  A golf  person just playing once a week!)

“Well, if you want to improve your game you’d play at least twice a week.  Why are you asking me about golf?”  He puts his drink down on the desk and I remain planted in front of the computer screen.

“Remember back when we were both working and didn’t have kids and I got you golf lessons for a birthday gift?  Do you remember how much that cost?”

“I think you paid $700 or $800 for six lessons.”

“Wow, I was soooo generous!  That’s a lot for just 6 lessons.  To get good at the game, you’d probably need way more than six lessons.  And let’s assume you’re new to the sport.  How much for a set of golf clubs?”

He cocks his head to the side and stares at me.  I smile back sweetly.  “You could probably get a nice starter set on E-bay or something for $2,000.  You’re going to play golf now?  You’re going to blog about golf?”

“So, that’s easily $15,000 over the course of, say five months, right?”  I’m in control and totally nonchalant, having just proved my case.

“Yeah.  It’s an expensive sport…” He is thoroughly confused by this conversation.

“Guess how much it cost me to do my first bodybuilding competition last year?”  My voice sounds about 3 octaves higher than it should.  So much for confidence proving my case.  I could never be a trial lawyer.

“I don’t know.  $2,000 or $3,000?”  He shrugs.  He’s going to read it anyway, so I just point to my computer screen and his eyes are knitted as they scan calculations.  When they reach the total his eyes open pretty wide.  Not Whoopi Goldberg wide, but pretty wide.

“It was about $5,000 for the first one,” I say, then add quickly, “but the second one was only $2,500 and I’m just saying, aren’t you glad I took up bodybuilding instead of golf?”

“Honey, I know bodybuilding is expensive; I used to do it.  Why do you think I kept freaking out every time the credit card bill came in?  But you got healthy and learned about nutrition.  All the fad diets you tried in the past never lasted.  For whatever reason, this time it stuck.  You lost 50 lbs. and you’ve kept the weight off for a year now.  You changed your lifestyle.  You’re changing the way our kids view food, so maybe they won’t have to go through all the yo-yo crap you did.”

“You’re not mad?”  I’m biting my thumbnail.  It was a lot of money to put on a credit card.

“Of course not.  How are you going to amortize $5,000 over the course of a lifetime?”  He gives me a kiss and I melt.  “But it’s good you’re going to be working again.  This bodybuilding s*** is expensive.”

Lisa ;) (c) 2013 Lisa Traugott.  All rights reserved.  No portion of this blog, including any text, photographs, and artwork, may be reproduced or copied without written permission.

8 responses to “And….He Read It

  1. Ahihihi… You are so busted. Whoa! Your husband got an earful from prowling your blog. 😀 A who’s who is a worst argument. Nice ending. Next time, never compare! 😀

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